Grounds for Divorce

Java. Joe.  Espresso. Brewed. Latte. Cappuccino. Mocha. Drip. French press. Melitta.  Black. Breve. Cream. Sugar. Light & Sweet.  No matter how you serve it, coffee is definitely something I could NOT dream of living without.  With reckless abandon, I ignore any medical advice telling me to cut back.  I tried that once, with disastrous results (in a night my college roommate, Emily, and a poor waitress will never forget!).

Do you know what I love about coffee?  I mean, aside from that first sip that touches your soul and makes everything right with the world?

It is a great equalizer.  Everyone drinks coffee, loves coffee, needs coffee, hates coffee, or sometimes is just apathetic about coffee.  Regardless, everyone knows something/has an opinion about coffee and it has absolutely nothing to do with your socioeconomic status, the color of your skin, where you went to school, who you choose to love, or any thoughts you may have on religion.

In all my travels, I have yet to come across anywhere that does not have at least one coffee shop (even my tiny hometown smack dab in the middle of Texas).  There is a reason Starbucks is $80 billion company.  They are everywhere and always busy.  In airports worldwide, there is almost always a Starbucks—except perhaps Minnesota, where Caribou Coffee is king—and there is always a line. Even in Dubai airport, there is a Starbucks—and even at 2am there is a line of people getting coffee.

But it’s not just about the big guys.  And if you’ve come here because you love all things Starbucks and are hoping that I will extol the divineness of the lovely siren’s coffee, boy are you in the wrong place!  But stick around, you might find something you love more…or equally as well…or not.

Every where there are small artisan coffee shops popping up and building a loyal following—and they have been doing so since 1530, when the first coffeehouse appeared in Damascus.  By the late 1500s, coffee and coffee houses made their way to Constantinople, where it became such an integral part of life that a wife could divorce her husband on the grounds (pun intended!) that he did not provide her with an adequate supply of coffee!  I mean, it certainly would be for me!

So tell me, what are your thoughts on coffee?

 

Re-Introductions.

Happy National Espresso Day!

Today seemed like the perfect day to relaunch this severely neglected blog.  As such, I’ve deleted all my previous work (don’t panic—if you’ve been here before, you know it wasn’t a lot) and I’m starting anew.  I mean, no one like a cold cup of coffee…unless you’re one of those weirdos lovely people who like iced coffee/cold brew.

So let’s brew a fresh pot and let me tell you how things got started…

“You better fucking write about this,” Ann commented as we walked into the New York Coffee Festival a couple of years ago.

“Yeah, yeah, I will!” was my enthusiastic non-commital reply while veering away from her, much like a toddler at the zoo.  To be fair to me, we had literally walked into the largest display of coffee vendors I had ever seen.  I think someone could have been throwing $100 bills at me and I would not have noticed over the enticing smells and sounds of coffee being ground, brewed, and espressoed. Well, maybe $5 bills. At some point, Benjamins are pretty hard to miss.

For five hours we visited coffee stall after coffee stall.  The coffee drink du jour was definitely cold brew.  I willingly drink the grand total of about 4 cold brew coffees a year, so I was a little disappointed in the stalls that only offered cold brew for tasting.

Except for this stall.

Their cold brew was not only served in a champagne flute but topped with a maple cold brew cotton candy.  That’s right MAPLE COLD BREW COTTON CANDY.  Holy shit…it was sweet.  A little too sweet for me, but I can appreciate cotton candy and coffee served in a champagne flute with the best of them!

Anyway, so here I am—nearly a year of starting and restarting and restarting yet again to bring you lots of information about coffee the only way I know how: humor, a little information, a lot of babbling, and fun expletives!

I have been wanting to branch out from EpicuriousTexan (shameless plug!) for quite some time now—it’s just been a matter of getting off my ass and making it happen.  I chose to start this website specifically for coffee because I wanted to write in a lot more detail about one of my true loves in life, but I didn’t want to turn ET into a coffee blog.

In addition to Ann yelling strongly suggesting to write about my adventures in coffee, I found this mug on Etsy.

coffee and cusswords

Which is pretty much the most accurate description of me ever.

My plan is to take you through all I know about coffee, including history, tasting, finding that perfect cup, and who knows whatever else coffee-related I can find.

Suggestions are always welcome, except for decaf, watering down the coffee, or toning it down on the cuss words–those might get you stabbed.  I’m kidding, of course!  Mainly because I have no idea how one would go about stabbing someone over the interwebs…

Thanks for popping in, grab a cup of coffee, sit back, and enjoy!